hmmm...it's sooooo complicated...
hye all...it's been quite sumtimes since i haven't write anything in my own world of thoughts...yeahh,been so busy lately with many important things n so important things in my life....but, i do survive n still surviving...hopefully i can make it through the rain....lalalala....hehehe...by mariah carey....
well, it's almost 3 months from now for me to be at QUT....so eager to get there yet so sad to leave my hometown n my loved ones n my room n my friends n my everything...i still feel not ready to face new challenges and perhaps new life overthere...but with God's will, i believe He will help me and guide me from doing anything bad or wrong when i'm at Brisbane...
*****for my close friends, im sory to keep this behind ur back....n keep denied it everytime u guys ask me*****
why my title for this time is it's so complicated...well,i also dunno y i wrote dat....but, i think it's the most approriate sentence for rite now....actually, i have played sumone's heart which it's unintentionally to do that and with no good reason i keep continue to do it...all times....he's been my friend for 4 months now...mind u that we haven't met but he already seen my pictures but i haven't..not fair, rite??..n for the past 2 weeks, he has proposed me to be his gf...for abt 5 times now...and last nite, he couldn't take it no more n asked me to stop hurting him....he did understand that my priority is study but he wants me to hv relationship with him....which i dun actually want it at the first place...but i dun want to let him go...as he is so good...n perfect to be a husband...btw, he's 25...im confused whether to accept him or not...but seriously i dun want him to out of my life...n i really want him to be with me...for the rest of my life...OH GOD...I THINK IM IN LOVE....
but, what if sumthing happens when we are apart from each other...for 2 years...what if i found sumbody else and he still waiting for me..what if he found another gurl n i still wanting him...what if we both dun have the agreement to be together?...what if everything that happens rite now is only a mistake...n hurts both of us??..what if i couldn't accept and also does he....what if that...what if this...all these questions keep repeating in my mind and do influence my considerations to accept him...n the big question is...will my parent n family accept him??...will his parent n family allow me to enter their circle??...hmmmm.....
therefore, i ask him to give me 2 weeks to settle everything and i think im ready to face the consequences...perhaps, it might hurt both of us...esp him since he love me soooo muchhh....n...i dun know....
pls,who ever read this, decide for me...should i n shouldn't i accept his proposal....
thanks....n till here...bubbye
Rule number 1:never ever date ur bestfren.
Posted by: aiMi hAyAti | October 15, 2006 12:52 AM